Bane Outtakes

~The first of the latest Batman film trilogy, Batman Begins, is one of my favorite movies.  The second film (The Dark Knight) is, as the title suggests, much darker, but Heath Ledger gave a fantastic performance as the Joker.  But I don’t much care for the final film in series, The Dark Knight Rises.  It was enough to make me wish I was watching the old Adam West Batman series from the 1960s.

Fortunately, The Dark Knight Rises can be vastly improved by substituting some of the dialogue of Bane (the main villain) with this dialogue created by youtube user Auralnauts:

^ “Not sure about the lettuce…I would have gone with the mixed greeeens.”

Here are the full lyrics to Bane’s (apparently undefeated) freestyle rap:

I'm Bane, yes, that's my name.
When you hear the name Bane, I guarantee the pain.
I'm coming after you, Bruce Wayne.
I'm stronger, smarter, and clinically insane.

I'm Bane, yes, that's my name.
Bruce Wayne and the Batman are totally the same.
I broke his back mortal comBAT smack,
then I cracked my '28 Krug champagne.

I'm Bane, yes, it's a shame.
I declare martial law, and you all complain!
I laugh when you ask why I wear the mask.
I'll explain. It's because.....

I'm Bane, yes, that's my name.
You say it too much, the name becomes inane.
Of course! Some think my plan lacks gain.
If you say it too my face, I'll crash your plane.